What causes Problems in Living?

Problems in living, whether they be expressed as free-floating anxiety, panic, phobias, or sexual dysfunctions, are frequently the result of simple physical and behavioral processes that have gone awry. We are basically biological organisms, with a given physiology and learning history.

Some of us are more prone to anxiety, some of us more prone to mood issues, some to issues of anger management or assertiveness. This is largely the result of our physical predispositions and how we have learned to handle and interpret the results of those predispositions.

A person with a heart disorder known as mitral valve prolapse is prone to having panic attacks, for example. The person feels a physical sensation as a result of this condition, and may mistakenly label it as a heartattack. The person then develops a fear of ever having such a feeling again, and the fear of this fear becomes an overwhelming aspect of the personality.

We "talk" to ourselves all the time, providing ourselves with observations and feedback about our
own behavior and situations. Sometimes what we think of as a problem is simply a matter of having learned bad labeling. We may make global assessments that may be very self-defeating.

A failure at work is not regarded as a failure in this instance, but as an indication that we are stupid and will ALWAYS fail at WHATEVER we try. Sometimes this is the result of ways we have been taught to think, internalizing what we have always heard from others. Therapy is sometimes a process of learning to understand this history. Such understanding is not the end of therapy, however. We must then learn to change what we do and think.

A man who has had a bit too much to drink may be in an amorous mood. Because alcohol is a central nervous system depressant, however, he may not develop an erection during the course of sexual activity. Rather than understanding that this was a temporary problem, the man may start causing himself problems by believing that he is somehow inadequate. He may even then begin to develop anxiety about sex, and avoid such interactions entirely.

We can learn to counteract these tendencies, however. The field of behavior therapy has developed to the point where we can learn to understand how we sometimes engage in behavior that exacerbates the problems we all run into in everyday life, rather than solving them. Therapy is a process of learning, realizing how we sometimes don't engage in helpful behavior, and sometimes do things that exacerbates the very problems we are trying to solve. There is a rich literature of specific exercises and techniques for counteracting problem behaviors and thinking patterns. We encourage you to take advantage.

Dr. Bobby Newman has offices in Manhattan, Long Beach, and, Long Island.          

http://www.room2grow.org       e-mail at darkoverlordaba@prodigy.net

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